Survive

Tomorrow, June 7, is National Cancer Survivors Day.  I was debating whether to write this, but I thought maybe someone else going through this might find some strength in my story.

On November 19, 2022 I had several major seizures and I went into cardiac arrest for 8 minutes.  The doctors told Bonni and the kids to expect the worst in the next 24 hours and that they might have to make some tough decisions. When I got through that, I was in the ICU for about a week. Then I was in MCR for the next 41 days.  They ran every test known to medical science, sometimes multiple times.  They found that I had a brain tumor, as well as Kidney cancer. Latter they also discovered that I had a sabaceous carcinoma, as well as something on my thyroid.  I had brain surgery and thankfully the tumor was benign. I got home and had to learn everything again. Walking, writing my name, everything.  In the next two and a half years I had 8 surgeries. I had one kidney removed as well as my thyroid.  Multiple lymph nodes removed, a port placement, and a tumor the size of a baseball removed from my back. I also went through 30 radiation treatments, 17 immunotherapy treatments.  More MRIs, catscans, ultrasounds, x-rays, and blood draws then I care to remember.  

I got through it, I don't know how but I did. I'm not a strong person. I cried a lot.  I was terrified that I was going to die. But I had no choice, I wasn't just going to lay down and die.  

Step by Step, day by day I went forward. Where there setbacks? Oh yes.  I got to ring the bell twice. I rang it for me and those who never got the chance to ring it.  I rang it loud and proud. The first time, I almost ripped it off the wall.

But I couldn't have done it alone.  Im not going to mention any names, except for Bonni and the kids, because my memory isn't what it used to be and I don't want to offend anyone.

I have an amazing care team. The Drs, nurses, ma's, the cna's, even house keeping.  I cant say enough and thank you just seems so inadequate. I literally owe you my life.

To my special friends and neighbors.  Thank you so much for every thing you did and still do.  I hope someday I will be able to repay you, but I know what you would say. 

Bonni and the kids.  My love for you all is so much deeper. Our relationship has grown in ways I couldn't even begin to imagine.

And my grandson, yes I'm poppa Jim, you gave me a reason to go on, not that I didn't have many.  The next granddaughter I will love just as much.

I could write a book of thanks, but I will just tell each one of you separately when I see you.

I don't know why I was chosen to stay and others did not. Why I have so many special friends.  I'm a lot slower, get tired way easy, don't have all of my original parts, walk with a cane, but the world is sweeter to me, and each day is a gift.  Like the song I have listened to way to much says, I hope some day you get the chance to live like you were dying.

Jim Lafferty, proud cancer survivor.